04/14/21
Happy 40th Birthday Lisa! Allthough you are not here with us physically, you are with us in our hearts forever.
01/03/18
Every day hug the people you love and tell them how much you love
them. Let them know how much they mean to you.
On January 2, 2003, my oldest daughter gave me a big hug. She told me
she loved me.... and would see me later. It was my last hug from her,
my last I love you to her face, my last time I would hold my baby in
my arms. I can't believe it has been 15 years since that last day I
saw her. It doesn't seem very long ago and yet it seems forever. I
miss seeing her, talking with her, laughing at her jokes and
silliness. And mostly I miss hugging her. Lisa, I miss you so much,
You are in my heart...always and forever!
01/03/17
I know for certain that we never lose the people we love. They
continue to walk beside us. They are near, even if we don’t see them.
They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we
make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint on us.
They are in our thoughts and in our hearts always and forever.
Lisa,
when I close my eyes, I see you and when I open my eyes I feel you.
My heart and my soul will always be connected to you. I am grateful to
have been your mother and you my child. I will always love you…forever
04/14/14
Happy 33rd Birthday Lisa. Take good care of Isaiah Pokey. We all miss you and think about you constantly. You'll always be my lil' lamb.
Lots and lots of love always,
Dad
01/04/13
I love you so much Lisa and miss you every day. I wish so badly that you were still here with us. I miss my big sister. I want you to know I will always carry a piece of you in my heart and I take comfort in knowing you are there watching me and guiding me. I love you.
love Jenny
04/14/12
Lisa,
Happy 31st Birthday. I think about you and talk to you all the time. I know you are listening . I know you want me to "Reach Out" and help others and I want you to know I will try. I Love and Miss you so much!!!
Love, Your Momma 11:09pm
04/14/11
Happy 30th Birthday Lisa.
We love you very much and miss you.
Mom & Dad
01/03/11
Can't believe it's been 8 years. You are still loved and missed.
Anonymous
02/26/10
I miss you so much, today and everyday
01/03/10
You are always in our Hearts. We love and miss you so much!
10/25/09
Dear Lisa,
Although I wasn't able to meet you in person, I feel like I know you so well. Since I started dating Tiffany, your family has become an important part of my life, and through them, I see you and know you. Your mother, father, and sisters are all so caring, gracious, giving, entertaining, and most of all, loving. I know that you are such an important part of their lives, and that they love you with an endless love that can never be diminished. When I am with Tiffany, I see just how much you mean to her. She misses you, but I think that she knows you are always there for her. Another way that I am reminded of you, is whenever I drive to school or work. The street next to ours is called "Lisa", so now whenever I see it, I think of you, your sister, and the rest of your family. I sometimes wonder if maybe its more than just a coincidence. I am beyond happy to have Tiffany and your family in my life. I just wanted to write this to you, to tell you that I am sad that I never
had the chance to meet you in person, but by getting to know your family, I know that you are a great woman, a great daughter, and a great big-sister.
Love, Jeff
04/14/09
Happy birthday Lisa.
Love, Forrest
01/19/09
Hello! Once again, it's January and Lisa's beautiful face popped into my thoughts and brought me here. Just wanted to say that I know that even after all these years it is NOT easier to deal with your loss, but the message u send out is still loud and clear and I hope this site helps others as you intended. I am always grateful for the time I had with Lisa and to have shared so many laughs n hugs with such a sweet girl. God's blessings
Marie
1/3/09
We love and miss you!!!
12/25/08
Dearest Gary,
My name is Lisa and I am a third generational recovering alcholic/addict with nine amazing years of recovery.
I am sorry for your families loss and wanted to convey my sincerest blessings to you on this Christmas holiday.
I would like to share with you some of how I came to find this site and my story. I began using drugs and alcohol at the age of 12, finally got clean at 39 and am now approaching my 48th birthday on April 9th. My recovery was long and arduous as I was in over 40 rehabs in/outpatient in over 8 states, spanning a length of 25 yrs. There is no earthly reason I am still alive as I have come within seconds of my life on numerous occassions. Including by my own hand. I must concede that my work here is not done.
I am currently writing my memoir...and today I was in the process of rewriting the first 2 chapters and decided to possibly add a quote to the chapter and googled "detrimental parental addicts" (these were the words I used)....and the first site that came up was another site linking to yours. When I opened it I saw "lisa's light" and the proposed legislation. I knew this was not a coincidence. In addition, I am currently involved in a program called California Alternatives to Violence Project in No. Cal facilitating intensive workshops in the Prisons. In this program we give ourselves names and use them in the workshop. My name is "Lightfilled Lisa" Another coincidence?
13 yrs ago I spent 3 yrs in prison for possession of cocaine. I had 2 children by different fathers. My youngest son was in sun valley, Idaho living with his father and stepmother. I had not seen him in 5 years and his father did not know where I was. They hired a private investigator, served me court papers in prison stating that due to my sons stepmothers desire for parental rights to my son, they were taking me to court to take my parental rights to my son away, permanently. To say that I was devastated was an understatement. Alas, nobody has compassion for the anguish and pain of addicts as the prevailing thoughts include "They did it to themselves." However, I know that the pain is the same and no different than another's.
My mother was in New York at the time and Idaho's laws at that time stated that "A grandparents rights are derivative of a parents rights." In essence, if I lost the case, my mother would also. This was not acceptable to her. She hired attorneys and went to court, while I was in prison and on the phone in the courtroom. I lost the case. But, my mother won. The case set a precedence and made a new law in Idaho( that only 3 other states had). With this new law every grandparent in the state of Idaho would always have the right to see their grandchildren. And vice versa..... no matter what.
In my devastation, I thought about what came out of the tragedy(self inflicted or otherwise) and I can see that I was a part of something amazing for so many people. (albeit unwittingly) I uncovered the diamond. It is always there. I believe there were many souls co-creating a bigger picture. And a better world.
Lisa's death and your families pain and subsequent advocacy surrounding underage drinking reminds me of my story. An even greater tragedy would have been to let her death be in vain as so many people do. Your family has been courageous in your healing and in "Spreading Lisa's light and legacy"
Love and Light, Lisa
12/23/08
Its been almost 5 years, and I still miss you.
I make so much more music in the studio now, you would be proud of me. I have worked really hard at learning to make the beats we loved so much. I even run my own record label now.
I dont spin records out at the underground events as much as I used to, but when I do I still look out for you on the dancefloor. I guess I still expect to see you there. I don't know if I will ever get over that.
I have tears in my eyes as I realize that we haven't talked in a long, long time now, and that it seems strange to me... more strange than the human mind can understand.
I'm being wordy now, but the truth is I just miss you... I always will miss you. I can't help it.
I can't ever do justice to our relationship in words, so I will go on faith because I know that you are in heaven and as you said to me in my dreams in the early days when you first left us, "I understand it all now."
So I know you understand how much I always must love you, my dear Lisa, my dear friend.
In the love that only Christ can bring to us,
VJ
05/21/08
I am sorry for your sorrow. I have been visiting Lisa's site for the last 3 years on and off. I wish you strength and I wanted to give you partial credit for helping me with my LONG journey into sobriety.
God bless you guys and may Lisa rest in Peace.
Sean P
Chicago, IL
05/02/08
To the Stoefen Family:
It's Rebecca, I went to Lisa's memorial page today and saw the link to listen to Lisa's last message to you all. Listening to it, my eyes filled up with tears. I kept listening to it again and again. I think you are all being so strong through this, I know it is the most painful thing your family has ever gone though.
I know that Lisa's still with all of us. She's in our hearts and our minds. She's watching over us.
I love you all and miss the Stoefen fam! Next time I'm in San Diego I will definitely stop by!
-Rebecca Wilner
04/12/08
About 4-5 years ago I was at the AA La Jolla's speakers meeting when I saw a news paper article posted on a wall. I took a closer look and found that it was an article about Lisa. It really shocked me because I was in a spanish class with her my freshmen year of high school. I always remembered her because she was so pretty and seemed like such a cool person. Her story reminds me of how lucky I am to be 6 years sober. Your web site is a beautiful tribute to your daughter, and your message is so important. God bless your whole family.
Ryan
02/27/08
Beautiful, fun, always smiling, dancing, giving hugs! That was SO u. I thought of u today and I miss you lots. It's Feb 27th, 2008. I still share ur story with my daughter, Vienna..she is 13 now, and my son, now 14. They remember you and smile..we always will...b at peace Angel. luv u.
HoppEr
02/17/08
Dear Lisa and Stoefen Family,
Knowing you and your family has changed my life. I only wish that I had been around to properly pay homage to you and what you meant to me. A better friend or person is hard to find in this world. You will always be remembered, cherished and missed.
Alan
01/07/08
Dear Lisa and Stoefen Family,
Yet another year has passed and I still remember where I was when I heard of this horrible accident, which is in my neighborhood. I remember how deeply Lisa's story touched my life and each year since her passing, New Year's always reminds me of her and the Stoefen family.
My ex-husband has battled addiction most of his life and my daughters and I know first hand the pain and struggles it brings. The strength of the Stoefen family with this disease helped me get through some of my darkest days living with an active addict and a better understanding of the "disease". My heart goes out to all the families struggling with this disease of addiction. Lisa, your story remains a continued discussion with my girls who are now in their late teen's and I truly believe has helped them think twice about drinking. Your family will not be forgotten..
Wendy
01/02/08
Hello, family of Lisa.
I am a grateful recovering alcoholic. A "retread", really, back through the doors of f2f AA again just close to 6 months ago. I now have 6 months and 3 days sober.
I was sent the web sight "Lisa's Light" before I had my slip. I looked at it a lot of the years, and recently looked at it again.
I wanted to thank you & your family for sharing Lisa's life with us (on the web). I am reminded this disease IS "cunning, baffling, powerful", and never goes away. It waits inside, waiting for our minds to begin to slip so it can sneak back inside of us. I know that is what happened to me, and I can identify with Lisa's story.
THIS time - I simply went up to the first woman I saw and depended on "faith" for God to put "the right sponsor" in my path. I must say - he chose better than I have in my past attempts. ...my sponsor came in when she was 20, been in & sober 20+ yrs,. Her name is Lisa. I think of your daughter sometimes when we are speaking - and while I never knew your Lisa, I think of her sitting with us and smiling...
Thanks, again, for sharing Lisa's story with so many people.
Peace be with you (all).
Becky B.
01/17/07:
Little Lisa =)
Today you popped up in my thoughts and now it's January 2007 and I still miss u more than ever.. luv u angel!
HoppEr
10/24/06:
Of course I have no words. And I'm not sure how I found your daughter's site. Must have been a recovery link. Im 12.5 years sober and I love the web page you did. I know this to be my truth, the exceptional ones go home young. All of my friends that passed on early were the ones you couldn't find anyone to say anything bad about. I look into your daughter's eyes and I see that exact same thing. Im going to pass this link along to my sponsees. It sends a fantastic message that she is still helping people along the path of recovery. God Bless your family, we're all in this together!
Anonymous
8/20/06:
I miss you Lisa, I had not talked to you for a while, but all the good times when we were little, all those games of duck hunt and random days in the cul-de-sac will be treasured in my heart forever. You were my first, best, and greatest best friend. I wish I would have been there when you needed me, but I foolishly was too busy doing my own thing, I'm so sorry. I will never forget you. I had always hoped that somewhere along the line we would meet again.. and we will... Just not as soon as I would have hoped.
Love always,
Don
6/20/06:
Little Lisa.....that's what I called u and u were taller than me!! haha. I am writing this tribute to you, because last night I had the most wonderful dream. We were sitting at a park somewhere just talking and giggling. You were always such a good listener and a friend. You were wonderful to my children and they ask about you now n then. I wish we could see u again, but my faith assures me that I will. I will see u again my friend, I love you!!! =)
--Anonymous
4/15/06:
I am sorry for your loss of a beautiful daughter. I
know how it is to lose someone very close to you. My brother passed away
when I was five. I am now 13 and can still remember everything about him. It
was very tragic for myself because I was right next to him when the gun went
off right into his heart. They wouldn't let me see him in the hospital and
at the funeral he wouldn't wake up for me. He always woke up for me and when
he didn't then I knew something was very wrong. See he had the same
addiction as your daughter Lisa. He became very depressed. Here is a poem
that I wrote when I was 12:
Even though you are gone from this dangerous world you will never leave my
heart.
I know you are probably in a better place and getting a good start.
Don't forget that someday I will be up there not only to visit but be with
you forever.
Just meet me by the golden gates and never leave me again.
I wonder sometimes if you are in heaven or still on this earth as a spirit
protecting me.
I will always love you and will see you someday in heaven.
Tell our heavenly father i will see him someday.
Hopefully it is soon because thinking about you makes me wonder why I'm
not with you.
I will not take my own life just to be with you,
but wait for my time to come and be in heaven with you for eternity.
Thank you for sharaing this story with me. It helps me cope with
everything I have been through and helps me understand what life is actually
all about.
Nikia
(age 13)
4/02/06:
It's that time of year when your family will re-live the pain of your tragic loss. You would have celebrated another birthday. I am so sorry that you had such a tragic and painful young life. God rest your soul. Rest in peace, you have earned your wings, angel! You are free to fly through eternity!
--Anonymous
1/03/06:
All I could think about this morning when I first woke up was that today is 3 yrs since the accident. I wil be praying for Lisa and the rest of her family today.
To Jenny: You have been my best friend for several years and although we live far from each other, we are always there for each other. I am here for you if you want someone to talk to.
I love you all!
Love,
Rebecca Wilner
12/21/05:
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Your daughter looks like a beautiful girl and I am sure you miss her terribly. My uncle died from alcohol addiction when I was 11 and my family was devastated. I have an older brother who is 20 and I fear that he is heading down the same route. I cannot talk to him about it because we do not get along but I love him alot and just hope that he can help himself. He recently applied to join the RAF and has been a lot better since.
My thoughts go out to Lisa's family and friends and I pray that God is looking after Lisa and that as an angel of heaven, she can help those with her disease.
God Bless
xxxxxxxx
--Anonymous
(Age 16)
11/22/05:
I hope that Lisa's story will help bring light to other teenagers and help stop other people dying from drunk driving
--Anonymous
10/08/05:
I have been to this site more times than I can count but have yet to actually be able to write something. You are an amazing person and you continue to touch my life everyday. I wish I could see you even one more time so that I could get one last hug. The truth is I can't but I will think of you everyday in every decision I ever make. You truly are a hero. I only wish I was able to figure that out while you were still here with us. I love you.
--Anonymous
09/04/05:
I have visited this site before and for some reason, I consider this website my sponsor.
Alcoholism has run in my family for many generations and I have seen it kill and hurt many members of my Family.
My Dad has been sober for 15 years now, my Mom is fighting a losing battle. I'm 24 years old, my Dad is 44, my Mom is 39, and the one who seems to be losing the battle the most, is my identical twin brother. I was reading some of Lisa's poetry when my office phone rang. It was my brother, drunk out of his mind at 3:30 pm on a Sunday afternoon. I thought; "Wow, this is Ironic". I hate to say it but I feel like my brother will be the victim of this unforgiving disease. My brother has no regards for anything when he's drunk, including his or anyone else's safety. It turns him into a monster. He's aware of it, but he still doesn't want to quit drinking. I wish that I could just lock him up somewhere, but I can't. My family is supportive, my parents put him through rehab twice, and still we can't do anything about his alcoholism. he's very cunning and sneeky, just like alcoholism itself. It's breaking my heart. My brother has gone from a good looking, athletic young man, to a complete mess. My Mom is another story. She refuses to admit she even has a problem. I know she's aware of it, she just doesn't want to quit. The doctors have warned that her liver is not healthy and instructed that she seek help. I KNOW ALCOHOLISM WILL KILL MY MOM. It kills me.
I'm sorry for your loss. Lisa was a beautiful person in every way and I never met her. That speaks volumes, not only for Lisa herself, but for the parents as well. You raised an incredible person and you too are incredible people for sharing your tragedy to help others. Makes me believe there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. I'm grateful for Lisa's light and I feel her with me.
Thank you.
SGP (CHICAGO, IL)
08/11/05:
Lisa,
So young, so full of life, with such a big heart. You will be missed baby girl. May God hold you in the hollow of his hand.
I am a husband and father of a precious gift as well. A wonderful daughter, age 4. I am also a newcomer to AA. I will carry this message about this disease that affects us .
All my Best,
Jerry
07/10/05:
After I first saw this website, I kept on coming back to it. It's so touching and true. Lisa, you were such a beautiful girl taken by God at such a young age. I really hope that you're alright where you are and that you're happy and safe.
Lots of love,
Gabrielle
05/31/05:
Lisa, your story is an absolute tragedy. I'm only 16 years old and come from a very alcoholic family. I just started drinking also. I have been drinking at times and never looked at it as "dangerous"...I believe I stumbled onto this website for a reason...you are reaching out and helping people. Next time I go to lift that bottle to my lips I will think about you...Thank you...
--Anonymous
05/25/05:
I just returned from an AA meeting where a woman spoke of a recent relapse and the devastation it has caused her. Then I come home and find this tribute to Lisa. I have been relapsing at a very high rate. Tonight, I'm paying attention and I will visit this site often to remind myself that alcohol kills. Prayers for all of you.
--Anonymous
05/20/05:
A beautiful young women.........that I will never get to meet. My heart breaks as I sit here in the middle of the night and cry. Thank you for your courage in posting this. It is a real honor to have met you, your family and Lisa this way. I am a recovering young woman and have relapsed recently after 4 years. I needed to see and read this. I was once a detox nurse at Laurelwood Hospital. We were kind, loving and nuturing to our people. I only wish I could hold Lisa and tell her I love her. I can't wait to meet her soul in the next life.
All my affection.
Nancy
04/28/05:
Precious Angel in Heaven, your memory lives on. Lives are being changed, teens and adults are seeing that light! What courage and wisdom of your family to keep this going and have such a yearning to get this message across and save lives! God Bless you and your family!
Much love and prayers
~Tangi~ (Louisiana)
03/01/05:
Aloha & Mahalo for shining the bright light in the islands of Hawaii. It is for sure the message of alcoholism has been successfully "lit" here in the sunshine state. I will definitely carry the message in paradise; however, even here paradise can be devastating due to the illness of alcoholism.
The message is Lisa's Light...
Thank you for sharing Lisa's Story.
jc (AA)
02/23/05:
Thank you for making this website, it must have been painful for you to do, but trust me it opens up eyes...I'm very sorry for your loss...
-[Anonymous]
12/22/04:
I want to pay tribute to Lisa and her family. Lisa did not die in vain. Her spirit continues to help me and other people stay sober. She is like a guardian angel to us now. I am thankful to her family for sharing her story with everyone.
Kevin from Milwaukee WI.
10/02/04:
I don't know you, Lisa...my name is Lisa also.
Reading the beautiful things people have written brings tears to my eyes and I think of my daughter, Tara, who is 19 and I try to tell her what can happen but know I will show her.
Thank you for sharing this.
Anonymous
08/31/04:
I have been clean and sober for 14 years now and I light a candle every night for those that are still in pain so that they may see the light.
Anonymous
08/02/04:
Lisa,
I often visit this website to check back on current tributes, and the beautiful words people say about you. It is obvious to us all that you are loved by many. Time has passed, but the lesson you taught to many will continue to always lives on. Jenny and I sometimes talk about you and how hard it is living each day knowing you are not there with your family. It's hard, but we do it. You, your mother, father, and 2 sisters have made such a positive influence in my life. Your family means a great deal to me because of how much heart they have.
Rebecca Wilner
06/07/04:
God bless you, Baby!
I have gone through this website tonight and have felt a feeling in my stomach that is so empty. I did not know you or your family, but with alcoholism all around our family and me having 3 children, I could not help to feel this emptiness. My husband and I are both sober. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your story and to Mom and Dad....thank you for sharing it with all of us and allowing us to be a part of it.
Love and Prayers always,
Jackie
03/24/04:
Hello Lisa,
I am a 23 year old female fighting the disease of alcoholism and drug addiction. I am just now finding my higher power and I definitely could feel him working through you tonight when I was linked to your story. Our situations are frightfully similar. Even though I did not know you, from what I have read you are SO beautiful and I want you to know how much you have touched my heart tonight. I will think of you and your family often...especially when I feel like giving up on my sobriety.
Love,
Laura A.
02/26/04:
Hello Lisa,
We have never met but I heard your dad speak about you this evening in the AA meeting. He gave me a realistic look on life and this disease. He made me think when he said "this disease kills".
Thank you.
John K.
02/02/04:
I have never met Lisa or her family but was reading about her on this website. I have been in recovery for almost 8 years now and this story really touched me. I was 23 when I sobered up and I am grateful to be alive.
I too, under the influence, got into my vehicle all the time and with friends. I could have been you many times. Today I have two beautiful daughters, ages 2 and 3 months.
I'm sorry for your family's loss and sorrow.
And even though I never met you, I felt inner peace while reading your story. Thank you to the family so much for sharing Lisa with all of us. You are an angel in heaven now looking over all of us.
Anonymous
01/26/04:
I have never met Lisa but I am overwhelmingly touched by the message her family has sent out. I have a twin brother who is an extreme alcoholic and like Gary, alcoholism runs in my family as well. I have lost loved ones as a result of alcohol abuse.
I'm terribly sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine how hard it is and I don't want to.
I give you praise for having the ability to help people and use Lisa's death as a lesson to those of us everywhere who still have a chance.
Lisa, you're beautiful.
-S.P
Chicago, IL
01/16/04:
I never met Lisa, or the family... I was a friend of Casey's - of "Casey's Law". I came across this link in looking up articles on AB-216. I just wanted to thank you guys for joining in that fight - brief as it was. I know the day will come when they put the lives of innocent and misguided adolescents before the profits gained from alcohol companies. Your strength and dedication to this matter is amazing, and I wish you the best of luck.
Lisa, say 'hi' to Casey and Kyle for me...
Candice
01/15/04:
Thank you. I have not had a drink for almost one year now and your story has given me even more courage to continue my sobriety. Your life was not lost in vain. Thank you for giving your life so others could learn from it.
Anonymous
11/24/03:
Lisa -- your story is so sad! I have never touched a drink in my life (I'm 15) and I really have no reason to, but if I am ever in a situation where I would like to drink, I will think twice! Thank you angel from above...
Chelsea in PQ
11/04/03:
To Lisa's parents,
I wrote a tribute to you and the family.(written 04/02/03) Well, on Sept. 5th, 2003, I lost my brother to his disease of addiction. I have such an emptiness in my heart that I can never fill. Now I do understand what Lisa's sisters have gone through. I am still sober...have 51/2 years now. I now speak at high schools in their health classes on addiction and will have my certification in alcohol and drug counseling.
Diana C
Santa Barbara,Ca
06/21/03:
Sweet Lisa, Rest sweet angel, rest...
To the parents, siblings, friends and family, may you all find peace and know your sweet angel is resting now.
God watch over all of you
Joanne & Family
06/10/03:
My name is Evelyn. I found your sight by way of Sober City. I am in the midst of what I hope is the worst crisis I will ever face because of my addictions. I am forty years old. The story about Lisa brought tears to my eyes as I looked at the site and read the stories. I too started drinking as a teen. Sometimes I wish my parents would have done something more than just throw me in a cold shower. And then I see stories like this and know that it has to come from inside. Lisa's parents obviously tried their best, it was up to Lisa in the end. Thank you for sharing her story, you gave me another reason to stay sober today.
06/04/03:
My Name is Tracy Scherer and I have a website. I was sent your website, dear Lisa, by a friend. My sweet Lisa, I know you only by your photo and what I have read. I know that you are over-looking what your parents are doing here and will help many. You are a light that will shine forever!
05/06/03:
My name is Kelly Chohany, and I organized the "Every 15 Minutes" program at Rancho Bernardo High School on May 2nd, 2003. My best friend was killed by a drunk driver and ever since I have been passionate about educating young adults about the consequences of their actions while drunk. It is my greatest hope and dream that the message of Lisa and others will be heard thoughout today's youth. Young adults do not see the consequences first hand, and therefore think "it will not happen to me". I thank you Mrs. Stoefen for sharing your story with the 3000+ kids at Rancho Bernardo. If we changed just one persons mind about drinking and driving- it was a job well done and worth all the work and dedication. Best of Luck in the future.
- Kelly Chohany
05/04/03:
Lisa,
You were one of my best friends in sobriety until we relapsed together. We were together every day for a long time. We even worked together. You were always a sister to me. I know that if it wasn't God saving me and putting me in jail, I would have been with you that day. I love you more than you will ever know. It kills me inside that I was spared and you were taken. You helped me get sober for the first time and I will never be able to thank you for everything you did for me. I just got out of jail a few days ago and the news of your death rushed thru me like finding out I lost a sister. I hope you have found the comfort you deserve in heaven. I love you and I am sober again. I wish you were here to go to meetings and dances. All I looked forward to while I was in jail was to return back to my life in sobriety but it's just not the same. I thought I saw you the other day and it tore me in two to realize that you were gone. You were like my big sister. It sucks that I don't have you to talk to anymore. I love you and you will always be in my heart.
~ Anonymous
04/14/03:
Happy Birthday Lisa, an Angel in Heaven. You kept this alcoholic sober today.
~ Linda S.
05/01/03:
Dear Lisa,
I read your story and I saw your face...you must have been an angel because I could not stop myself from crying and feeling your pain, that I also share....I wish I could have known you, but in spirit I do and I will meet you some day....thank you
Jackie
04/08/03:
To Lisa’s family and many friends,
I did not get to know her very well, but from what I saw of her I thought that she was cool. You touched the hearts of many people, and you still will.
Everything happens for a reason. "When a door closes a door opens." That door which was closed was Lisa's physical life here on earth, but that door that opened has started a wake of emotion, which will hopefully provide people with the information to make better decisions in life. This door that has been shut has helped keep opening many others. Those doors that have been kept opened will continue to make an on going affect on to others. We will never know how many lives her journey has saved. God needed her, he needed her to perform more miracles in many other places and times as well as this. We will never know why exactly he chose to take her at that time, but there was a good reason, in His plan for us all.
We will miss you Lisa!!
~ Anonymous
04/03/03:
Dear Lisa,
Although we never met, it seems like we've known each other forever. We were reading an article of you in class and it touched our hearts. It feels like you were a piece in our hearts that we found. Knowing your story made us think twice about even drinking one glass of alcohol. We know you are in heaven and you're not struggling anymore because you believe in the Lord and we know you're up there. God has always blessed you and your family, and sent you to heaven where they will soon be. So may you "Rest In Peace".
From: Tylice and Martha
04/03/03:
Dear Lisa, I miss you every day. Every time one of our songs comes on the radio I cry. I keep you with me all the time and you're helping a lot of people. I shared our story with some kids in Phoenix last week and it touched all of them. There are a few girls who have started coming to the meeting after they heard your story. Thank you for helping them. I love you with all my heart and I know you are dancing up there in heaven. Tell Thomas I said hello.
Love, Forrest
04/02/03:
Lisa, your struggle is over for you and your family. I am a recovering alcoholic/addict and I know the struggle you fought so hard to fight. I have 4 years in sobriety and I am still fighting my disease everyday, but in 12-step meetings I have learned to be strong and to pick up the phone when things get too bad. For the family -- I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my daily prayers.
Diana C
Santa Barbara,CA
04/01/03:
I was very touched by the article in the LA Times today....losing a child has to be most painful. You are very brave and to be commended for getting Lisa's story out there to other
kids. If you even save one, you've done your job...May God Bless You and your family.
Donna
04/01/03:
Lisa -- I didn't know you. I'm 26. I'd been drinking since I was 16. I thank you and your parents for letting us know your story. I don't know how many people are going to get your message but after I was done reading your story I promised myself that I will never drive while intoxicated. Thank you again and may your soul rest in peace. I know that your family and those who were close to you must be very proud of you, Lisa. Thank you.
~ Alex
03/20/03:
I only heard what a wonderful person you were. I know the bad links of this terrible world took you away from your family. But now you are away from bad temptations. I hope your soul is finally at peace. This world will soon end and one day you will get to be with your family again. Rest in Peace -- we got your message.
~ Soto Family
3/3/03:
I never knew you and you never knew me, but our families were linked. I know that you are in a better place and may you be watching over your family and friends.
~ Tracy Pomerantz
2/26/03:
Lisa, you are with Him now. The Highest Love. We will learn and understand from you. Your human experience here will always be remembered. Thank you. Rest easy.
Say "Hi" to Kat for me, will ya?
~ B.S. in Carmel Mountain Ranch
2/24/03:
I didn't know you Lisa, but from what I have seen you where an ANGEL sent from
GOD. He has called you back to be with him,
but the lives you touch will never forget you. Now that I know you in just a little
reading, I want to thank you for shining your lite in my life. Here is a poem for those that are suffering:
The Lord Loves You and Me:
I was blind now I see
“The LORD loves you and me”
If you ask he will lead
You to perfect harmony
“The LORD loves you and me”
Just ask him to come to thee
He will gladly you will see
“The LORD loves you and me”
If you ask he will show
A love for all Christians know
“The LORD loves you and me”
His glory is for you to see
“The LORD loves you and me”
Why can’t everybody see?
“The LORD loves you and me”
If they did they would know
The kind of love that only He can show
I was blind now I see
“The LORDS love inside of me”
~ by Michael Tucker
Thank You Lisa for touching my heart.
2/24/03:
Lisa, I know that despite this horiffic accident, you are in heaven dancing with the Lord. Though I only know your dad, I heard many glorious and wonderful things about you. You will be loved and missed by many. God bless you Lisa.
~ Anonymous
2/23/03:
Lisa, when I first heard that you had died I just couldn't believe it. I always remember going to your house when you lived in Mira Mesa. Your sister, Jenny, is one of my Best Friends since kindergarten. You were a great person and I wish I could have known so much more about you. I always knew that you were a great sister and a great daughter. May God always be with you. It was great knowing you when I was younger and I will never forget you.
~ Jennifer
2/22/03:
This tragedy will go through everyone's mind. We grieve for those who suffer and miss you. Sadly, I never knew you but could see you were a pretty young girl with love in your heart!!! We will miss you.
~ Anonymous
2/22/03:
Lisa,
There are some students who teachers just can't forget, and you were one of those. I especially remember your quiet, shy spirit and your beautiful, gentle manner. As your middle school English teacher, I would like to write you a poem because you wrote so many in class.
SWEET DREAMS
Now is the time to say "Goodbye"
Sweet dreams, Lisa
Peace after your storm, now a calmer soul,
Your victory over conflict is over
Your life's race of time is well run
Is now remembered for good that was done
A recollection of your symphony of life
From simple clay to immortal status.
Dear Lisa, you had your day,
Brief as the twilight be.
You've moved through the last of life's struggles
To a better place where the spirit has wider avenues minus close confinements of a fleshy tabernacle.
This life is only one mansion and there are many more.
It is not the whole of your stage--the shade is just pulled
Feel peace and leave this frail existence,
Depart your tired and wounded body.
Now's the time to say goodbye,
To wave a farewell scene.
Your life a miracle, death a mystery
Future--a secret still untold.
Your character survives and your goodness lives on.
Love is immortal so I sing no sad songs.
Sweet dreams,Lisa.
Love,
Mrs. Perkes from Challenger Middle School
2/22/03:
Lisa, you don't know me, but I have a son like you. I read the story of your tragic accident and pray for your family for peace to rein on their hearts. The disease you suffered is so uncaring; it takes and takes from your very soul. and from the people in your life who love you the most. My son is a beautiful person but the alcohol in his life will destroy him. Many of the same paths he is crossing you crossed also. I am so sorry the world had lost such a vibrant beautiful woman. I know God has got you cradled in his arms, kissing your head, comforting you. God will give you riches in your heart you never thought possible. People you do not even know are touched by you. Be at peace little Lisa,
Be at peace.
Dawn
2/21/03:
Lisa,
I've known your Dad for many years through his work, but I never met you until your memorial today. What an awesome young lady and what a blessing to so many lives. And even though you're not here with us, I want you to know that you're still touching hearts, and that you will live forever in the hearts of many, including mine. Until the time comes when I have the pleasure of meeting you face to face, may the Lord our Savior keep you ever in his arms, and may you continue to be an angel of support to us all. And yes, I'll keep the light shining....
~ Anonymous
2/20/03:
Lisa,
Although we never really had any conversations, I know that you are a very sweet, caring, and considerate sister, daughter, and friend. Everytime I would go to your house, you always greeted me with a warm smile. You will always be here with us in spirit and will remain in our hearts forever. We shall never forget you.
~ Rebecca Wilner
2/19/03:
Lisa,
I only met you once. But what I saw was beauty, compassion and a sincere desire to do well. I wish everyday that I could have gotten to know you better than just that one lunch. You and I share something - I still pray for those who still suffer. I will NEVER forget you. Your death will bring good into this world somehow, just as you brought so much good into this world when you were here. I'm lucky to have met you Lisa and I think of you all the time.
~ Patty
2/19/03:
Lisa,
Just last night I got the news that I will no longer get to see your beautiful face here on earth. You are such a sweet soul and will remain forever in my thoughts and in my heart. Thank you for entering my life and changing it forever. May your soul rest in peace, Lisa. I know you are in a much better place.
--Anonymous
2/17/03:
Lisa,
I will always love you and you will always be in my heart and my mind. I will never forget your beautiful smile and your kind heart. I feel blessed to have gotten the chance to get to know you. Sharing memories with you like going to LA for halloween, the picnic in Mission Beach and just hanging out for coffee will stay with me forever. Now there is a missing piece in my life but I know that you are with me in spirit. I miss you so much but I know you are with God now.
~ Suzanne
2/16/03:
Dear Sweet Beautiful Lisa --
Girl from across the street. Smiling face, blond hair catching the sunlight - you were the pretty neighbor girl that would send a wave and smile. As I read on how you touched so many people, I realize that we had an earth Angel living near us.
Please watch over us Heavenly Angel...
Your Neighbors Mike & Tina - And the small cat you gave us, Noelle
2/13/03: (poem submitted)
GOD'S LENT CHILDREN
I'll lend you for a little while some
children of mine," God said.
For you to love them while they live,
and mourn for them when they are dead.
It may be six or seven years or forty-two
or three, but will you, when I call them back,
take care of them for me? They'll bring
their charms to gladden you, and should
their stay be brief, you'll have their
lovely memories as a solace for your grief.
I can not promise they will stay, since
all from earth return, but there are
lessons taught below I want these
children to learn. Now will you give
them all your love nor think the
labor vein, nor hate me when I come
to take these lent children back again?
I fancied that I heard them say,
"Dear Lord, Thy will be done, for all
the joys Thy children bring, the risk
of grief we'll run. We will shelter
them with tenderness, we will love them
while we may, and for the happiness
we've known, forever grateful stay, but
should the angels call for them,
much sooner then we've planned,
we'll brave the bitter grief that comes
and, try to understand."
--Author Unknown
2/12/03:
Lisa-
The light in all of our lives,
Your smile radiated beauty within,
I think of you often and smile with love,
Missing you knowing the world is absent a magnificent person.
I am a better person for knowing you and loving you, my life will forever be changed because you were a part of it.
Thank you Lisa for teaching me lessons too hard to learn...
for reminding me of God's love and forgiveness and ever amazing grace. You were and always will be an angel to me. I miss you so--words cannot express.
Take care of the angels in heaven as you did on earth,
Cody's every breath reminds me of your journey and the innocence lost among this world...Cody sees you in his dreams, Angel Lisa.
I love you sweet, beautiful Lisa
~ Cammie Stoefen and Baby Cody
1/27/03:
You always came out to dance, even when things were odd between us. What an incredible friend! You never missed a beat, if you could help it. Chase me and my records out into the desert, you would... and not think twice about it.
I will not forget you. First glance was magic, because you had a depth unfathomable. You demanded attention with sweet, soft adamance.
Thanks, my friend, for dancing with me. Deep house beat to frenetic drum and bass pace.
You were always there on the floor, pulling every ounce of energy from every beat.
Gosh, I love you for that. I love you for your smile, and for every moment that we shared. And for your writing, your beautiful poetry. Your kind words...
You let me know you, and I got to be one of the closest to your heart. What a bitter-sweet notion, now that you are gone from this place... Yet, I regret not one bit of it, because it is all a gift.
Thank you for letting me see your pretty, pretty flower of a soul. Thank you for supporting me when I went after the Lord. Thank you for loving me enough to let me go.
Thank you for everything. It was all a beautifully real dream. Be at peace, Lisa, my beloved friend, be still and dream dreams so beautiful and real.
~ Anonymous
1/26/03:
A beautiful young woman
Graceful, engaging, soft
Lovely, gentle, with smiling eyes
Whisked away so young
Words are inadequate
There is sorrow in my heart
For all who loved and love you
~ Anonymous
1/25/03:
We all miss you Lisa and wish you were here right now with us on earth. But you are here. You will always be here. In our hearts and in our memories. Right now all of our hearts are broken. But when I think of all the fun times I had with you, my heart fills with joy but then again sadness thinking of how I'll never get to have more fun times with you. I'm just thankful I got to spend a lot of time with you Lisa. You are are such a sweet, nice, funny, and beautiful person. I love you and I always will. You will be forever loved, missed, and remembered.
~ Anonymous
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